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Self Compassion

Jun 23
3 min

Oh! That Voice.

Imagine a world where you believe, without question, every vile thing your worst enemy tells you. They have access to your deepest fears,...

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Natalie Hartney, LPC NCC

Jun 16
3 min

The Self in Three States

The number three. Blood, sweat, tears. Life, Liberty, pursuit of happiness. Location, location, location.

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Natalie Hartney, LPC NCC

Aug 11, 2018
3 min

Shame

You are born. You are basically a blob. Don’t get me wrong-your parents probably think you are an adorable blob, but you are, nonetheless...

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Natalie Hartney, LPC NCC

Mar 28, 2018
3 min

Who am I now?

Whether it is a retirement, divorce, marriage or recovery, while transitions come with great rewards they can also leave us with many que...

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Natalie Hartney, LPC NCC

Mar 21, 2018
3 min

Who's driving this bus, anyway?

Imagine that you are a bus driver. All your thoughts and ideas and inner voices are your passengers. Maybe they are future plans and drea...

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See the cycle of abuse before you're in a spin.

Natalie Hartney, LPC NCC

Mar 21, 2017
4 min

See the cycle of abuse before you're in a spin.

Unfortunately, a first date doesn't include the tradition of disclosing issues of being a perpetrator of violence in a relationship, or o...

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Natalie Hartney, LPC NCC

Mar 16, 2017
3 min

The Green Monster: Jealousy

In my therapy practice I hear people acknowledge their feelings of romantic jealousy in a relationship, quickly followed by the revelatio...

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Natalie Hartney, LPC NCC

Mar 9, 2017
4 min

So many questions in the aftermath.

When we emerge from a personal disruption, we can waste a lot of time asking questions for which there are no answers. They seem to swim ...

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Natalie Hartney, LPC NCC

Mar 6, 2017
4 min

Storm Clouds Clearing

As we regain equilibrium following a s#!t storm disruption, new patterns and habits emerge. We may feel frail, but experience periods of ...

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Staying Calm in (What Feels Like) a S#!t Storm, Part II: The Awakening

Natalie Hartney, LPC NCC

Feb 17, 2017
3 min

Staying Calm in (What Feels Like) a S#!t Storm, Part II: The Awakening

As we covered in Staying Calm in (what feels like) a s#!t Storm Part I: Resiliency, there are many times in our lives when we may feel li...

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Natalie Hartney, LPC NCC

Jan 25, 2017
3 min

Staying Calm in (What Feels Like) a S#!t Storm, Part I: Resiliency

There are many times in our lives when we may feel like the proverbial rug has been pulled out from under us. Maybe it is a financial cri...

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Natalie Hartney, LPC NCC

Nov 10, 2016
3 min

I Messed Up: How to Do Better

Sometimes we goof. We flub. We royally screw up. It is bound to happen, we are human after all. It is what we do next that matters most. ...

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Natalie Hartney, LPC NCC

Nov 3, 2016
2 min

When Counseling Succeeds

When I was in grad school I heard a classic tale about counseling: A man is left in a cave with a challenge. He has enough provisions for...

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Natalie Hartney, LPC NCC

Oct 27, 2016
3 min

When Counseling Fails

When I see a new client, one of first questions I ask is about their history with counseling. Sometimes the answer is heartbreaking. A ba...

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Natalie Hartney, LPC NCC

Oct 20, 2016
2 min

From Rescuer to Coach

In the role of rescuer, you may feel a strong desire to "help" by taking over for a person. And even though helping may feel like the rig...

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Natalie Hartney, LPC NCC

Oct 13, 2016
2 min

From Persecutor to Challenger

It can be very difficult to think of ourselves as the persecutor in our little dance of dysfunction. I encourage you think carefully abou...

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Natalie Hartney, LPC NCC

Oct 4, 2016
2 min

From Victim to Thriver

Imagine a better communication triangle. Through learning new moves, you can engage in a whole new dance whose triad is supported through...

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Natalie Hartney, LPC NCC

Sep 30, 2016
2 min

The Endless Dysfunctional Dance

The dreaded drama triangle. Ever been in an endless fight? After you read this, you may never see the argument the same way again. This i...

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De-escalate? I'm ready to go through the roof!

Natalie Hartney, LPC NCC

Sep 21, 2016
2 min

De-escalate? I'm ready to go through the roof!

First: See last post for tips to "get control of yourself!" Then, prepare for the conversation you want to have. I will often suggest to ...

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How to be the Most Powerful Person in the Room

Natalie Hartney, LPC NCC

Sep 15, 2016
3 min

How to be the Most Powerful Person in the Room

I used to say that only an insecure person shows up to a water gun fight with a machine gun. I'll refine that a bit for our purposes here...

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